It’s crunch time. Wedding A-B is finally this weekend.

In the last month since I wrote so much has happened by the way of drama, poor decisions, wacky timing and general dysfunction, that I am not sure I will ever have time to write about all of it. Here is a brief list of some things that have happened.  The shower went off well and everyone loved it. Bonus! But then from there it has all been downhill. One break down after another, the bride, her mother, the spoiled sister, and of course the mother in law to be. It has been a circus. The spoiled sister stabbing the bride in the back leading to a very pleasant couple of weeks for the brides main support system, aka, me. While the bridge was caught up in things that really in the end don’t matter, some “real” stuff started happening. Her grandfather got sick, and she herself had a health scare. But still, even with these warnings in perspective, she can’t seem to see the bigger picture and release the small details that don’t matter.  Her type A personality took over as she tried to control things that she couldn’t. PS I am also Type A, but to a point.  Her type A is debilitating to the fact of not being able to move on after tasks are done because of second guessing and over analyzing. Prime example, name cards. While one person was able to tie 60 bows for the name cards, she was only able to write 10 table place cards. This does not make for very productive gatherings.

Another bone in my side has been the general lack of help from the other bridesmaids. To be fair, one was from a distance and two moved away during the past year, but that still leaves two other girls (one of whom is also getting married), myself and the bride. I knew I wasn’t going to get any help, but damn a girl can dream. So in case any of that wasn’t clear, the wedding party broke down like this, 3 girls more than 3000 miles away, one girl planning her own wedding, a spoiled sister and me.

Needless to say, the over dramatization of certain events and items have brought me to the brink. I am a patient person, a yoga teacher who dabbles in Buddhism, and has a general compassion for people with a lack of perspective, but this wedding has brought me so close to the edge of blowing up. It also brought me to a whole new place of apathy about the wedding industry (and I didn’t like it before). The desire and the need to be perfect and have the perfect things to make you whole is a lie that can start a marriage off in debt. Not a great place to be. So many weddings and couples fall victim to this kind of mentality and I can see it spiraling out of control. Honestly people, that new blender does not fill any holes you might find in yourself. And I am pretty sure you can do with 2 full dish sets and don’t need four. And gasp, maybe even keep an item until it is old before getting a new one.  Priorities people, priorities!

And for the last rant of the day, if you make a decision, (bride, groom, bridesmaids or MOH’s)  take responsibility for the outcome. If you made a decision that leads to a negative outcome don’t wallow in woe is me,why is the world so cruel, take responsibility for your role in the decision and its outcome. Each decision has an action and reaction. They are not mutually exclusive, don’t pretend like they are to get sympathy. Basically what I am saying is don’t let things go to your head and cloud your judgement, last time I checked you are an adult and responsible for yourself and your decisions.  Remember that most of the time, you made the bed you have to lie in.